To Begin Again: Coming back from a Creative Sabbatical

Hey Fam!

Over the last couple of years, I've been working on fully embracing my roles as a wife and mom.Occasional crying and questioning, but mostly embracing! #iykyk

In order to do that, I had to take a pause for the cause....

A fountain pen rests elegantly on the smooth pages of an open journal, inviting thoughts and reflections in the warm glow of ambient light.

Press Pause

I remember wanting to capitalize on some of the momentum I was getting from the devotional and demo. I already had ideas for more songs and more books. I was fleshing out ideas when I heard, "Not yet."

I was getting some content ready and trying to get back out into the acting scene. Over time, I was getting less and less confirmations and missing more and more messages. "Not yet."

Shameless plug, but now I bring my concerns to #GodandGigs360, an amazing group for creatives. I'm encouraged to pray and seek clarity from God. I'm also advised to prepare my heart. Let's be real, I know what I want God to say, but it could be very different from what He actually says. Over time, I get the answer. Not the one that I wanted, but the one I needed. I didn't know what was going to happen, but I knew I had to trust God.

When it Rains, it Pours

Literally, over the course of time, it felt like life was just smacking us around! On every front, mind you. Just when it seemed like everything was coming together... so many transitions and moves across the board, honestly. I just knew it required me digging deeper than I've ever had to before. It took prayer. It took looking at myself and seeing what I needed to change. It took having hard conversations... VERY hard conversations. It took the level of patience that only God could provide because I wanted to give up more times than I'd like to admit.

Then...the calm came...

Rebuild

Soon, the real work began. The best way to describe it (as a Floridian) is like cleaning up after a hurricane. You check for any major damage. Then you look to see what can be repaired quickly versus what will take more time. Then you assess what you have versus what you need to get. I am grateful that my husband and I are both visual people. We had a chance to write some things down and make a plan. Then, we had to submit that plan to God. After a lot of hard work, prayer, and discipline...and some setbacks...we were able to see progression and restoration. All wasn't lost.

Now What?!

So, I waited. As hard as it was, I waited. I celebrated others. I found alternative ways to support people. I had to remind myself that I am not just a creative. It ached laying that part of me down for a season, but it forced me to dig deeper into the things that God wanted me to grow in. If anyone knows the easy way to go through growing pains, holla' at me, because man! Not cool on ANY front! But, the wait was worth it. Now, it feels like I'm brand new to everything. Like a clean slate. I'm open to learning. I'm embracing the possibility of collaborating more. None of these things are mine to hold or control. If I truly believe that I worship God through my creative process, I have to be able to lay it down when called to, and pick it up when needed. I have to take the limitations off. I have to stop holding on so tightly.

Easier said than done, I know.

Looking forward to what this new creative season will bring.

Is there anything that God has called you to lay down for a time? Were you able to go back to it? Comment below!